Jeans - Levi's has a 502 model, why won't they release it?Diet Food - It's making me fat. You know that ingredient on the box you don't know? It makes you hungry so you eat more diet food.
Auto-tune - Rappers are half alien.
Chewing Gum - Carrying '5' gum actually does not make me cooler than the old school five pack of juicy fruit.
Juicy Fruit - Does not really contain fruit. (I am also skeptical of fruit stripes gum)
Old Navy - Beginning to doubt their clothes are old or sea worthy.
Tupac Shakur - Notice his name backwards [R u k? ah S! cap u T!] Clearly an indicator of him living in Snoop Dogg's basement. (Similar strategy can be used with Elvis Presley)
Full Moon - I have a sneaking suspicion the moon doesn't eat, and if it does it is very large and would require several continents in order to be full.
Electric Slide - May transform from a line dance to a playground death trap.
Fencing - Using those skinny swords and white suits may not be conducive to enclosing a yard.
Conclusion: Be skeptical of the world around you. If you have a good conspiracy theory of your own be sure to post it as a comment.
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